Although I’ve only recently (for the past four days) been posting, I’ve had this blog for awhile. There is actually a post that I wrote in March and published back in June that is currently a draft again. Because I really didn’t think it was all that great. It goes into detail on why I finally started writing and whatnot, but it was just alright. I’m incorporating some things from that post into this post and adding in somethings that should have been addressed before.

I’ve loved literature and words since I was two. I’ve been a PK (Preacher’s Kid) since I was 8…And I’ve loved music since mid-elementary school when I had an obsession with Mase (I neither need nor want your judgment! ). God, words, and music are an inextricable part of me. Couldn’t get rid of them even if I wanted to. I guess it’s fitting that I’m drawing from two of those areas to pursue my passion in the final area.

This blog has been in my spirit for at least three years now. I always have an excuse, though.

“I’m getting ready to graduate; I don’t have any time.”

“I’m getting ready for my first year of teaching; I don’t have time!”

“I’m overwhelmed by my students, school obligations, my evaluation process, grad school and my relationship. I REALLY don’t have the time to write!”

It hasn’t been a priority for me. I’ve been too busy doing what I was supposed to be doing.

Well, after accidentally becoming Student Council advisor (yes, there’s a story there; no, I won’t be writing it) I attended the state convention with a small group of students in February. One of the speakers was this phenomenal guy named Yahya Bakkar  (check out his site) who spoke about ditching his doctor-dreams, and finding his purpose and biological mother after 24 years. I shed a tear, of course. Afterwards, one of my students was so moved by his session that she practically demanded that we stay to get an autograph and chat with him. She really didn’t have to do much convincing since his speech was so engaging, and I really wanted to hear more about how someone my age discovered his passion. We waited at least 45 minutes for the crowd to leave and then talked with him for another hour. He talked about how pursuing your passion boils down to doing what brings you peace. He made a point to emphasize that sometimes you have to experiment with a lot of different things before you discover what you’re here for. A common message, but it stayed with me as I drove home because I had been reflecting on my aspirations right before the convention.

A couple days after this encounter, I was twatching (Twitter/Timeline watching) and someone tweeted that Mike WiLL Made It was turning 24. I was shocked because he’s a super producer who’s controlling dominating the rap, R&B, and pop airwaves. You have him to thank (in part) for Miley Cyrus’ current behavior, as he produces a lot of her songs now. Anyway,  he was born in ’89. Like me. So I went to his Twitter account to find out more about him. I knew what he’s produced (because of his “Mike Will Made It” producer tag lol), but I had been slacking on keeping up with the music world as a whole because of school obligations. Well, his birthday is March 24^th, making him an Aries. Like me. And I was just like…”What is this foolishness?! He’s my age, my sign and he’s got the music industry at his knees…on some real Kanye bow-in-the-presence-of-greatness type stuff. And I’m still trying to determine what my true passion is!” That was slap in the face #2 (and a lot of stream of consciousness…but that’s me).

I continued to take direct metaphorical hits to my heart the very next morning when I went to church with my parents and was given the new “Our Daily Bread.” It’s a small, purse-sized pamphlet that imparts daily nuggets/kernels/gems of inspiration over a three-month period. I’ve never read through a whole pamphlet. I have a short attention span, crappy short term memory, and it’s difficult for me to stick to anything…true American girl right here. But I did read the March 1^st entry on a man from the 18^th century who used his interest in early exploration and God’s word to go on many a mission trip to spread God’s word and love. He is quoted as saying, “Expect great things from God; attempt great things for God.” Slap in the face #3. Sitting in church beside my first lady mom, watching my pastor dad in the pulpit, and I was JUST realizing that I was doing more than doubting myself and putting off a passion—I was doubting God.

I don’t know the chances of all of these revelations happening practically at once, but at that time (and even now) I realized that I was being led to change things up. And I didn’t follow through when I was first led to pursue my passion. Don’t really know what’s going to come of this blog or my writing in general. I just know that this is necessary for me. Spending my life living for quiet nights and the weekends isn’t what I planned for my life. And it’s not what He planned either. I love words. I love language. I love manipulating language. And I love listening to, analyzing, and connecting with music. I feel like I haven’t been myself in a long time. Haven’t read for pleasure or just zoned out listening to an album on repeat in awhile. Pursuing a passion is what God intended for us. And the success stories are ONLY of those who did so.

Can’t promise that every entry will be as sentimental as this. WON’T promise that every post will be as long as this one either.  As the bio says, I’m just trying to figure out my purpose. But I CAN promise to give you me…as best I can anyway. I know I’m not supposed to pick up strangers, but I do hope that at this point, you’ll stay along for the ride.